Brandi Hawbaker - a victim of life
I can’t say that I’m extremely surprised at the news that Brandi took her own life. I can say that I’m extremely saddened by all of it. I met Brandi on December 31st, 2006, at Howard and Suzie’s New Year’s Eve party. I guess I didn’t really meet her, she sort of made sure she got into a few pictures I took. After I put up the post on the New Year’s Eve party, I saw her at Bellagio. She was very friendly and told me that a friend of hers had sent her the link.
It’s difficult for me to say “I know them” simply because I’ve dealt poker to them. I do believe that I know a lot more about them from dealing poker to them than I would if I spent time with them anywhere else. Poker has a way of giving up a lot of information about a person’s character that you would never see in any other platform. When I discovered who she was - I briefly visited 2+2 and skimmed through a condensed version of what had developed to date. Some of it can be found by referencing Iggy’s blog although you may have to scroll to find it, he’s put in some links if you have the heart to follow the whole thread. I admit to giving up shortly after reading part of the summary on it. But then I got to see these people in the flesh, David Sklansky, Captain Tom Franklin, Brandi Hawbaker, Dutch Boyd, and Brandon (referenced in this article) - and a lot more that never hit the news.
I was invited to her birthday party last year. I saw her that night at Bellagio, she was in a game, and she said she was waiting for a few people to get in touch with her, one of them was David Sklansky. I was dealing and on shift, I wouldn’t make it.
Brandi always had a hug for me, and a special hello. I dealt to her and Brandon frequently in the 100-200 LH game when she would practically sit on his lap/share a chair with him and they took turns playing hands - if one of them won, they played until they lost a hand. She always talked to me, when I dealt to her, as if I had perfect control over her win or loss but never appeared to be ruffled with me if she lost during my deal.
On the side away from the table, I felt she was incredibly insecure and very much in need of attention and affection. And poker fulfills a lot of that need. Poker always provides a place to be, any time of day, you are welcomed into the fold. And the fact that she was a very attractive young lady made it even easier for her.
Did any one thing lead to her decision? I would believe it was a combination of things and her own inability to sort through the combination and come out if it with a clear picture. Life pushes us along, we choose how fast and where we’re going but some of us speed up when we should slow down. I can’t think of one good reason that Brandi left us…not one.
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July 8th, 2008 at 4:11 am
You took some very lovely pictures of my daughter, BrandiRose. I have so few, for many reasons only those close to me know. One being that my ex {Tim J. Hawbaker I} cleaned the family home totally out, including all of our family photographs and all my children’s pictures when he fled the State of NE after defrauding countless individuals, banks, the State, Medicaid, and the IRS using other people’s social security numbers including my own, and my son’s, Timothy’s II / Timmy’s, as well as a dead man’s. Not the first time he fled the State of NE, he ran me over and dragged me 4/10ths a mile with his Green Ford Explorer on 12/22/1995 and put my son and then my daugther {BrandiRose} into hiding for months with his drug dealing little brother, Todd Philip Hawbaker, who would send Tim drugs in hollowed out scented candles through the mail, and his cocaine addicted wife, Jamie Hawbaker, in Iowa. You asked “Did any one thing lead to her decision?” I know for a matter of fact that my daughter took her life over issues with her Dad. If you read “The Sociopathy Next Door” you’d get a pretty clear picture of who Tim J. Hawbaker {I} really is. And why try as hard as she did, BrandiRose, just couldn’t grip the reality that her Dad is totally incapable of love. Oh he is great at using and abusing people for his own gain, but LOVE, that word and concept does not register in his mind. And my poor daughter suffered greatly at her father’s 3 Personality Disorders, his gambling addiction, his drug abuse, and domestic violence. I know for a matter of fact that my daughter took her life over an email that Veronica Ford Hawbaker {Tim’s 2nd Wife} sent her the evening before she took her life. BrandiRose discussed the contents of Veronica’s email with her best friend in the whole world since high school, Poppy. Poppy and I recently spoke. BrandiRose and Poppy talked with each other the morning my daughter took her life. My daughter in a poem and letter left all her worldly possessions to Poppy, who although not family by blood, was the closest person in the world that BrandiRose could call “Sister”. Poppy has received nothing to date, because Tim J. Hawbaker I, BrandiRose’s Dad, while leaving my daughter’s body to rot in the coroner’s office in L.A., C.A. since he was notified of her death in the early morning of 4/14/08, was cleaning out her storage unit in Las Vegas, NV on 4/29/08 the day my older brother found my daughter dead on the Internet. Brandon {BrandiRose’s Ex} had been conned by Tim into picking him up at the airport and taking him to BrandiRose’s storage unit. I have since learned that Brandon was present at his house with my Ex, when my older brother called Tim to confirm the internet messages about my daughter’s death. Tim by fax took possession of the few belongings my daugher had with her in L.A., C.A. on 4/22/08 per the coroner’s report, including her lap top computer with Veronica’s email letter on it. Tim couldn’t even spend a dime to fly to L.A., C.A. to see his daughter one last time. When Tim found out that I knew my daughter was dead, he called the L.A.,C.A. coroner’s office and told them to cremate her at their expense and to ship him the remains. Cheap or What? You call that Love to let your own child, your own flesh and blood, rot away in a coroner’s office. In the early morning of May 1st, 2008 {by the way Tim J. Hawbaker’s real date of birth} I flew to L.A., C.A. to identify and claim my daughter’s body. BrandiRose finally made if home to her mom on Saturday June 28, 2008. Poppy and I spoke late in the evening of Thursday, June 26, 2008. Poppy called asking for some of BrandiRose’s ashes. They were to be each other’s maids of honors for their weddings. Brandon found the courage to call me after trashing me on the internet {without ever knowing me, or once ever speaking to me} to tell me that he loved my daughter and was Sorry for everything. Brandon and Poppy have since spoken as well. It is my prayer that my daughter’s wishes are carried out and that Poppy receives my daughter’s belongings. Brandon has since agreed to make a list of my daughter’s belonging which Tim stole from her. Brandon has told me that many of BrandiRose’s friends have had no closure since there has been no memorial service yet for my daugther. Part of the problem was that there was a delay in getting BrandiRose cremated due to Tim’s actions. Tim couldn’t even get the girl’s birthday straight and her death certificate now will be amended for the second time. Brandon told me that he would like her friends to get together to remember her. To those closest to my daughter a private service will be held when myself and my son are together again as a family. Myself, my son, and BrandiRose’s grandfather, and Uncle will spread her ashes in the ocean as she directed. BrandiRose loved the ocean and in that regard a memorial fund is being set up to save endangered sea turtles. The sea turtle was BrandiRose’s animal spirit since she started traveling the world at age 13. In addition a memorial fund is being established at Boystown, NE in her name and memory. There are many reasons for this. Again Thank You for the lovely pictures of my daughter. It’s still very hard to know that she is gone.